What when you get lost? | mteodoraa

 

For the past several days the same thing passes through my mind: What happens when you get lost? Who you become in the moment when you no longer have a place to go? Where do you go when you no longer have anyone and what are you looking forward to when the feeling of pain prevailed in your whole body? And now it takes you, you are slowly sinking deeper, you feel like diving, and you can’t reach to the exit from this cold and dark water. And you are diving. You are losing your breath. At one point you lose the will to fight. You sink even deeper. And slowly your heartbeats are diminishing, your lungs are filled with water, and your eyes are becoming more mutter and mutter. You are diving. Your body slowly relaxes, you don’t even feel pain anymore. And in the end, you lose hope. You lose hope that anyone will ever come and save you, you lose hope that you will ever again see the sun, feel the gentle touch of the wind on your face, that you will ever live your life with full lungs. And hope that everything will be okay, goes anyway. You’re completely lost now.

 

Već danima mi kroz misli prolazi ista stvar: Šta onda kada se izgubiš? Ko postaneš u onom trenutku kada više nemaš gde? Gde krećeš kada više nemaš kome I čemu se raduješ kada je osećanje bola preovladalo tvojim celim telom? I sada te obuzima, polako toneš sve dublje, osećaš da se daviš, a izlaz iz te hladne I mračne vode ne možeš da dostigneš. I toneš. Gubiš dah. U jednom trenu izgubiš volju da se boriš. Toneš još dublje. I polako ti se otkucaji srca smanjuju, pluća ti se pune vodom I vid ti postaje sve mutniji I mutniji. Toneš. Telo ti se polako opušta, više čak I ne osećaš bol. I na kraju svega, izgubiš nadu. Izgubiš nadu da će iko ikad doći i spasiti te, izgubiš nadu da ćeš ikad ponovo videti sunce, osetiti nežan dodir vetra po licu, da ćeš ikad više živeti punim plućima. I toneš i nade da će to sve ikad proći više nema. Sada si potpuno izgubljen..

 

But stop!

This isn’t the way your story should end!

 

Ali stani !

Ovo nije način na koji tvoja priča treba da se završi !

 

Let’s just go back a couple of eternity backward. You were born and you came to this world so that one day you would have the opportunity to change it. And then you grew up, you realized that you don’t want to change the world anymore, you only want to create your little world, your oasis of peace. You just wanted to love. And to be loved. At one point, you grow up. You realize that it doesn’t matter if someone doesn’t like you, who don’t support you,  you don’t care much about who and what they have to say. Then, it becomes only important for you to have someone who will hold you by the hand. Someone who won’t give up on you when it’s hardest, who will not hide in the hole while you fight with the shadows of the past and everything that falls and scatters you. One day, you will grow up. All that you have dreamed of in life will have some other meaning, it will have its name, color of voice, body odor and smile. It will have eye color, a gentle touch, and a heartbeat. It can be you, it can be your partner, your child, your parents, your friend, your pet. It doesn’t matter who it is, what matter is how much it means in your life. And it means you, a lot. Even more, than you ever planned yourself to let someone in your life mean that much. And you love it. You love with all your body, devote the days to that love, dream dreams that you know in advance that they may not be realized. And you grow. You are growing so fast now that you forget about this nice feeling that fills your whole soul and body. You grow up with abnormal speed and life is always a step ahead of you causing you pain. And you already lose your way. The years of life you’ve experienced are gone, you are already tired. They broke you. You are now at that stage of your life when you go day by day, and you seem to have nothing to live for. Do you know why?

 

Vratimo se samo par večnosti unazad. Rođen si i došao si na ovaj svet kako bi jednog dana imao priliku da ga promeniš. A onda si odrastao, shvatio si da ne želiš da menjaš svet, već samo da stvoriš svoj mali svet, svoju oazu mira. Samo si hteo da voliš. I da budeš voljen. U jednom trenutku, odrasteš. Shvatiš da ti više nije bitno ko te ne voli, ko te ne podržava, više te ne dotiču tuđe pridike i loši komentari, više te ne zanima šta i ko ima da kaže. Tada, postaje ti samo bitno da imaš nekoga ko će da te drži za ruku. Nekoga ko neće odustati od tebe onda kada je najteže, ko se neće sakriti u rupu dok se ti boriš sa senkama prošlosti i svega što pada i skrnavi vas. Jednoga dana, ti ćeš da odrasteš. Sve ono što si sanjao u životu, imaće neki drugi smisao, imaće svoje ime, boju glasa, miris tela i osmeh. Imaće boju očiju, nežan dodir i otkucaj srca. To možeš biti ti, može biti tvoj partner, tvoje dete, tvoji roditelji, prijatelj, tvoj kućni ljubimac. Nije važno ko je, već šta ti u životu znači. A znači ti, mnogo. Čak i više nego što si ikada planirao sebi da dozvoliš da ti neko u životu znači. I voliš. Celim telom voliš, dane posvećuješ toj ljubavi, sanjaš snove za koje unapred znaš da se možda neće ostvariti. I rasteš. Toliko sada brzo rasteš da zaboravljaš i na to lepo osećanje koje ispunjava celu tvoju dušu i telo. Rasteš nenormalnom brzinom i život ide uvek korak ispred tebe nanoseći ti bol. I ti već gubiš svoj put. Godine života koje si doživeo su prošle, već si se umorio. Slomili su te. Sada se nalaziš u toj fazi života kada ide dan za danom, a ti kao da nemaš za šta više da živiš. Znaš li zbog čega?

 

Because you used to live too much! You lived too much for other people, for dreams, for some better times. You lived too much And now you’re tired. And now it’s time for you to rest.

 

Jer si nekada živeo previše! Živeo si previše za druge ljude, za snove, za neka bolje vremena. Živeo si previše I sada si se umorio. I sada je došlo vreme da se odmoriš.

 

It’s okay not to be okay. It’s all right for you to feel hurt, it’s okay to spend days sitting at home with tears in your eyes. It’s okay to have panic attacks, hysteria, pain. It’s okay to collapse, to fall, to quit. It’s okay to look for shelter and peace. It’s okay to be a storm. Just don’t forget, nothing lasts forever. Nothing but love, courage, and faith. The pain will pass. After you cry, after you cleanse your heart from all this sadness, you will see. You will see that in your life, you need pain as a definition of happiness. If we were happy every day, we wouldn’t recognize that feeling when we pass the drivers test, when we finish school, when we find the love of our lives, when we wait for a child, when we travel to a dream destination. If we are always happy, we won’t be able to recognize happiness when she arrives. We won’t be able to be happy. Isn’t that the whole point of life? To be happy, like a little child, from the whole soul, whole heart?

 

U redu je da ne budeš u redu. U redu je da te boli, da danima sediš kod kuće sa suzama u očima. U redu je da imaš napade panike, histerije, bola. U redu je da se srušiš, da padneš, da posustaneš. U redu je da tražiš sklonište i mir. U redu je da budeš oluja. Samo ne zaboravi, ništa ne traje zauvek. Ništa osim ljubavi, hrabrosti i vere. Bol će proći. Nakon što se budeš isplakao, očistio svoje srce od sve te tuge, progledaćeš. Videćeš da ti je u životu potreban bol kao definicija sreće. Kada bismo svi bili srećni svakodnevno, ne bismo prepoznali onaj osećaj kada položimo dugo očekivani vozački, završimo škole, kada nađemo ljubav naših života, kada čekamo dete, kada otputujemo na destinaciju iz snova. Ako smo stalno srećni, nećemo umeti da prepoznamo sreću onda kada ona stigne. Nećemo umeti da budemo izistinki srećni. A zar nije i to cela poenta života ? Da budemo srećni, onako, kao mala deca, iz čitave duše, sveg srca ?

 

Happiness is there to share with others, but the pain is one step towards happiness. Therefore, if you feel like crying today, cry today. Do everything today to be smiling tomorrow. Today collapse the whole world in order to build a new one tomorrow. Today give up 100 times to succeed 101. Today, be who you are so that tomorrow you can be who you want to be.

 

Sreća je tu da se deli sa drugima, ali je i bol jedan korak ka sreći. Zato, ako ti se danas plače, danas plači. Danas radi sve kako bi sutra bio nasmejan. Danas sruši ceo svet, kako bi sutra izgradio novi. Danas odustani 100 puta kako bi sutra uspeo 101. Danas budi ono ko jesi da bi sutra bio ono ko želiš da budeš.

 

And don’t be afraid, the real people won’t leave you when the storm hits as much as they were afraid of. True people won’t leave you if you stumble and fall. And maybe they don’t get to the goal in time, but at least they will reach the goal along with you. And it’s not about the time, sometimes you will have time so much, sometimes too small. It’s not up to time, it’s up to people and to the feelings that provoke in you. It’s about happiness. About peace. About freedom.

 

I ne boj se, pravi ljudi neće otići kada oluja naiđe koliko god se nje bojali. Pravi te ljudi neće ostaviti ako se spotakneš i padneš. I možda ne stignu do cilja na vreme, ali će barem stići na cilj zajedno sa tobom. I nije važno vreme, vremena će nekad biti previše, nekad premalo. Nije do vremena, do ljudi je I do osećanja koja izazivaju u tebi. Do sreće je. Do mira. Do slobode.

 

And you need to dream dreams! You need to dream dreams so great that you are afraid of them. Just don’t forget one thing. There are some dreams of success, money, power, and glory … And there are some other dreams about life!

 

I treba da sanjaš snove! Treba da sanjaš snove toliko velike da ih se bojiš. Samo, nemoj da skreneš sa tog puta. Jedno su snovi o uspehu, novcu, moći I slavi… Drugo su snovi o životu.!

 

And you always dream dreams of life. If the whole world is heading for money, you head towards the sun. If the whole world is going to get out of here, you fight to find happiness here. If the whole world doesn’t believe in love, you will choose that love be guiding you. And if the whole world tells you that you won’t succeed, you only smile honestly and continue on. That’s not the way you need to live.

 

A ti uvek sanjaj snove o životu. Ako ceo svet juri ka novcu, ti juri ka suncu. Ako ceo svet juri da ode odavde, ti juri ka tome da pronađeš ovde sreću. Ako ceo svet ne veruje u ljubav, ti izaberi da ti ljubav bude vodilja. I ako ti ceo svet kaže da nećeš uspeti, ti se samo iskreno nasmej I nastavi dalje. To nije način na koji ti treba da živiš.

 

And it’s okay if you feel like you’re sinking. If you feel you’re dying and there are no exits anymore. Give yourself a little break. Get in touch with what you feel. Let all the bad feelings swell up to make you feel the rights that were hidden below fear of showing off. Give yourself some rest and let people fight for you. Those who don’t give up on you, you know, these people are worthy. You won’t give up on such people. Those who just escape, maybe they should stay there – far and deep in your forgetfulness. After each storm, the sun will appear. It will sometimes be accompanied by a rainbow. It’s time for you to be a rainbow.

 

I u redu je ako osetiš da toneš. Ako osetiš da se daviš i da izlaza više nema. Daj sebi malo oduška. Uhvati se u koštac sa onim što osećaš. Pusti da te sva loša osećanja preplave da bi onda osetio ona prava koja su se sakrila ispod bojeći se da se pokažu. Daj sebi malo odmora i pusti da se ljudi bore za tebe. Oni koji ne odustanu od tebe, znaćeš, ti ljudi su vredni. Od takvih ljudi ni ti nećeš odustati. Oni koji samo pobegnu, možda i treba da ostanu tamo – daleko i duboko u tvom zaboravu. Nakon svake oluje, pojaviće se sunce. Nekad će čak biti I propraćeno i dugom. Sada je red na tebe da budeš duga.

 

That’s why you need to love yourself. To love people. To love this life. You’re a good man. I know what you’re dreaming of. I know that you don’t think about cars, houses, lights of distant cities, a hill of money. I know what you want. I know that you want a warm handshake, ice cream on the nose, the love that your whole body trembles with, the smell of breakfast that wakes you up, every night when you fall asleep peacefully. I know that you want everything that words can’t describe, only can be felt by a heart. I know because I dream about it when I close my eyes, too. And that’s why I know how hard it can become. I know that your heart often gets tighter because you think that nobody understands you and that you are even more often wondering where this world is going. I know because I’m going through the same thing. But I’m passing, I’m not staying there. It’s important that you are just passing through. And that you will never come back to the same again.

 

Zato voli sebe. Voli ljude. Voli ovaj život. Dobar si čovek. Znam šta sanjaš. Znam da ne misliš o kolima, kućama, svetlima dalekih gradova, brdu novca. Znam šta želiš. Znam da želiš stisak ruke, sladoled na nosu, onu ljubav od koje ti zatreperi čitavo telo, miris doručka koji te jutrom budi, svaku noć kada miran zaspiš. Znam da želiš sve ono što se rečima ne može opisati, već se može samo srcem osetiti. Znam, jer isto o tome i ja sanjam kada zatvorim oči. I zato znam koliko teško može da postane. Znam da ti se često srce stegne jer pomisliš da te niko ne razume I da se još češće pitaš gde ovaj svet ide. Znam jer I ja prolazim kroz to isto. Ali prolazim, ne ostajem tu. Važno je da si samo u prolazu I da prođeš. I da se više nikada ne vratiš na isto.

 

Now relax, it will be difficult tomorrow. Perhaps the pain doesn’t pass soon, but at least you will know that it will pass someday. And you will try. You will know, however, that at the end of the day you did your best. That’s enough. Give everything from yourself for someone and someone will do your best for you. This is your straw of salvation. Your only way is love. Therefore, if you ever cry and think that there is no one who will save you, then you better drown. At least you know that you will be born again.

 

Sada se opusti, biće teško i sutra. Možda bol ne prođe skoro, ali barem ćeš znati da prolazi. I trudićeš se. Znaćeš da si ti, ipak, na kraju dana dao sve od sebe. To je ono za šta se živi. Da ti daš sve od sebe za nešto i nekoga i da neko da sve od sebe za tebe. To je tvoja slamka spasa. Tvoj jedini put je ljubav. Zato ako ikada toneš i pomisliš da ne postoji niko ko će da te spase, onda se bolje udavi. Barem znaš da će se roditi opet.

 

That’s why today you do what you want and what will help you to feel better. Life is ahead, redirecting your strength to build a life full of love and faith. And don’t forget: there will be many obstacles and pain and suffering on that road, but that’s why you are there. You are here to create and at the end of the day, you will be happy and calm. And you’re here to live your life. As long as you have what to live and for whom to live.

 

Zato danas radi ono što želiš i ono što će ti pomoći da se bolje osećaš. Život je pred tobom, preusmeri svoju snagu da izgradiš život pun ljubavi i vere. I ne zaboravi : na tom će te putu sačekati mnogo prepreka i mnogo bola i patnje, ali zato si tu. Tu si da stvaraš i da na kraju dana legneš srećan i miran. I tu si da živiš život. Sve dokle budeš imao šta da živiš i za koga da živiš.

 

It’s easiest in life to die. That’s why you need to find the reason for whom you’re going to get harder and live.❤

 

Najlakše je u životu da se umre.  Zato ti pronađi razlog zbog kojeg ćeš da ideš težim putem i da živiš.❤

dc hcniw


Find me on instagram.
Find my last post here.
Find my the most read post here.
For any suggestion or cooperation, contact me via email: mteodoraa25@gmail.com
I love you all!  ❤

Advertisements

23 thoughts on “What when you get lost? | mteodoraa

  1. vishalbheeroo says:

    Very intense reflection on our inner battles and hope to be human. We run too much in this insane competitive world that takes away so many from us, right from innocent and the light that characterizes us. Every word penned spoke directly to me.

    Liked by 2 people

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s